– by Mary May Larmoyeux –
It’s the time of year when thoughts turn to hearts and candy … and love! But what exactly is true love? And how can we show it to those we hold dear?
1 Corinthians 13:3-7 (The Message) begins: “… Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self.”
Now that’s the kind of love I want in my life and marriage!
Things that matter to my husband
My husband, Jim, loves to tinker with vintage automobiles. In fact, he’s restoring an old car right now. For Jim, the make and model of a car is a big deal. For me, who cares about make and model—it’s all about color. When Jim talks about something being a 350 or 427 cubic inch motor, it means absolutely nothing to me. But to my hubby, it means a lot—I think it has something to do with the engine.
And until recently I didn’t care whether his car was a Chevrolet or a Buick. But that all changed after a friend asked about the progress on Jim’s old automobile and then added, “Now what make of car is it?”
My answer, “I don’t know. I think it’s a Buick.”
My friend seemed stunned by my reply. A car buff himself, he said, “You should know things like that.” Despite my internal rebuttal, deep down inside, I knew he was right.
If Jim and I were dating, I would be able to recite the make and model of his old car—not just the color. And I would also know what a 350, 427, or whatever that is, really means. Why? Because I would be trying to show him that I cared about what he cared about. And, if I did that, he’d know he was important to me.
So, I asked my hubby all about the old car he’s restoring and did my best to remember what he said. Later, when we parked next to an orange truck I surprised Jim by saying that I really didn’t like the Dodge Ram’s color but was going to like the Ruby Maroon Metallic color of his 1941 Master Deluxe Chevy. Then I added something about its 350 cubic inch V8 engine and 270 horsepower.
Jim looked at me in total disbelief.
“How did it make you feel when I knew those details?” I asked.
“Very proud,” he said. “I know that you really don’t care about motors and knew that took extra effort for you. It said you love me.”
A Lesson Learned
Who would have thought that a few descriptive words about Jim’s old car would convey a much deeper message? That saying “1941 Master Deluxe Chevy” would mean more to my hubby than a mushy card or box of chocolate candy? Looking back, I now realize that those simple words had shown Jim that I cared more about him than myself.
“1941 Master Deluxe Chevy” had actually said it all: “Love!”
Post and photos © 2015 by Mary May Larmoyeux. All rights reserved.
Would you like some creative ideas listed by month that can help you connect with your kids or grandkids? Check out The Grandparent Connection: 365 Ways to Connect With Your Grandchild’s Heart by Nancy Downing and Mary May Larmoyeux.